Homeschool Helpers: 4 Ways to Motivate an Apathetic Learner

Does your student seem to dread homeschool time? Maybe dread is too strong of a word, but wonder and curiosity have undoubtedly been replaced with a “get it done” attitude. Either way, here are four things you can do right now to motivate an apathetic learner.

Homeschool Helpers: 4 Ways to Motivate an Apathetic Learner

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If we only look at homeschooling through the lens of curated Instagram feeds or idealistic sales pitches for the homeschool lifestyle, we can be tricked into thinking that homeschooling itself is the key to an inspired education that produces eager, voracious learners. Homeschooling can undoubtedly foster this outcome, but unfortunately it’s no more guaranteed than it is in a traditional classroom environment. 

Because of this reality, you may find yourself searching for that curious kid who loved tinkering, reading, or exploring all the things connected to subjects of interest. Similarly, you may find yourself wondering where you’ve gone wrong as the primary teacher, leader, coach, and administrator of your unenthused student’s educational journey. 

This is especially true if you’ve immersed yourself in wise, yet challenging teachings from educators like Charlotte Mason or Maria Montessori who focused on educational environments and leaning into the natural love for learning. 

Homeschool Helpers: How to Motivate an Apathetic Learner 

So what can you do to help a once-curious student fall in love with learning again? What can you do to help a kiddo who’s always seen school (whether at home or in a classroom) as a chore? How can you replace the get-it-done attitude with one that embraces opportunities for learning and at least somewhat looks forward to it? 

While there are no concrete answers for these questions, here are four strategies to help you motivate an apathetic learner and bring some wonder and engagement to your homeschool time. 

1. Listen to your kiddo.

Noticing a sense of apathy isn’t enough to combat it. That’s where conversations about apathy for learning can help. Ask your learner questions like these to gauge what’s going on and causing disinterest. 

  • When was the last time you were excited to learn something new? What sparked your interest then?
  • What keeps you from having that same excitement about our day-to-day learning plans?
  • How do you feel about homeschooling? What are we doing well? Where could we improve?
  • What is your favorite subject and why? Least favorite?

There’s nothing special about these questions, but they serve as conversation starters to help you understand your student’s apathy toward learning, especially if it’s new. Questions like these also help you as a teacher/parent understand the best paths to motivation and how to help your learner through the season. 

On that note, motivating an apathetic learner requires listening to both the spoken and unspoken factors that impact educational experiences. These unspoken factors can look like difficulty understanding particular subjects, being compared to a sibling or family member, or pressure to perform in a certain way. Stressors like these are often uncommunicated and can easily block motivation toward learning. 

Motivating an apathetic learner requires listening.

Identifying unspoken factors won’t motivate an apathetic learner, but they do point you in the right direction. Recognizing these factors and acknowledging them go a long way in helping your student find inspiration and a love for learning.

2. Encourage collaboration.

I talked to my kids about this one and they shared some valuable insight. My oldest kiddo made the point that there’s something out there that fascinates all of us. And discovering what fascinates us is the key to unlocking that spark and conquering apathy toward learning.

Thus, it’s important to Involve your kiddo in decisions about and direction for their learning. Obviously they shouldn’t be expected to drive every aspect of their educational trajectory, but allowing them to speak into what they’re learning and how can help tremendously when apathy strikes.

This includes input in the following areas:

  • Curricula and other resources
  • Pacing and schedule
  • Subject matter/inclusion of nontraditional subjects and interests
  • External learning through field trips, co-ops, and classes
  • Tackling some homeschool lessons outside of your home 
  • Local hands-on learning opportunities
  • Lesson enhancements like projects and reinforcement activities 

This type of teacher-student collaboration is one of the unique benefits of homeschooling, so don’t be afraid to make the most of it. In doing so, you can customize your homeschool plan – both the big picture plan and the day-to-day plan – to meet the individual needs of your student.

Input is crucial for students.

Think about it, none of us loves being told what to do, especially without the courtesy of knowing why we are expected to complete those tasks. The same is true when it comes to education. Motivation isn’t likely if a student doesn’t have input and can’t see value in what’s being asked.

Motivation isn't likely if a student doesn’t have input and can’t see value in what’s being asked.

Brave Writer founder Julie Bogart writes in The Brave Learner, “No matter how sugary sweet the requirement is, most humans resist being told what to do if they don’t see the value in the activity. People must believe that their efforts lead to a personally meaningful goal.”

With that said, motivating an apathetic learner through collaboration requires you to say yes to exploring a topic or using a curriculum because it will help satisfy a curiosity or be a good experience for your actual kids.

It could also require you to think outside the box and consider how possible changes could impact your student’s homeschool experience for the better. This includes changes like schooling in the evenings versus daytime, including or reducing technology, and homeschooling in places like parks, libraries, or other locations.

3. Be as present as your apathetic learner needs you to be.

Some instances of apathy occur when we leave our kids to be too independent in their learning. This may be because of distractions, difficulty in focusing, or even FOMO (fear of missing out) due to all that’s going on around them. It can also occur if kids legitimately need help with their assignments but think help isn’t available to them. 

Challenges like these make it difficult for kiddos to be attentive, which causes them to fall behind or miss key concepts. When this happens, apathy can easily set in and shape their attitudes about learning. 

Conversely, apathy can happen when parents hover and don’t allow independence when it’s desired or needed. In this case, parent presence can be a distractor for some kids because it detracts from their focus and prevents them from taking ownership of their homeschool experience.

Love in Learning blossoms when a child has a coach and an ally.

Regardless of where your kiddo is on the homeschool independence spectrum, motivating an apathetic learner may require you to reconsider this independence. For example, if your presence as a partner in learning would help to engage your student more, you can be more involved by asking questions about lessons, showing interest in your student’s takeaways, or reading lessons aloud while your kiddo follows along. 

Related: How to Help Your Child Embrace Failure

If it turns out that your kiddo needs a little less of your involvement, lean into this preference. Be available to help, teach, or guide when needed, but allow greater autonomy when it makes sense to do so. This increase in independence can provide healthy space in the homeschool relationship and goes a long way in exercising trust, both of which can negatively impact motivation when missing.

4. Be realistic. 

Finally, you can motivate an apathetic learner by being realistic about the internal and external factors that often impact learning. If there’s one thing we all learned by experiencing a global pandemic together, it’s that even the best homeschool plans take a back seat when uncertainty is swirling around us. 

In terms of homeschooling now, this is a reminder that apathy for learning isn’t always about the actual learning. Instead, it could stem from worry or concern about a family situation, frustrations about certain weaknesses, or apprehension about an upcoming change.

It could also stem from overstimulation, anxiety, or a season of busyness. All of these scenarios can make it difficult to enjoy learning, much less view homeschooling as a time of wonder, creativity, and anticipation.

Closing Thoughts

In closing, remember that motivating an apathetic learner starts with listening. From there, you and your learner can work together to find realistic ways to bring inspiration and enjoyment back to homeschooling and the learning process.

And if you’re looking for more practical ideas to motivate your learner, grab a copy of The Brave Learner by Julie Bogart. It’s one of my most-read books about homeschooling and contains tons of help relevant to this challenge.