Does he mean that? Oh, he does mean that.
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You have no idea how many times I uttered that phrase while reading Ted Cunningham’s Fun Loving You. I’m still speechless about some aspects of this book, but speechless in a good way. This book delivered so many things I didn’t even realize I needed to hear.
After thirteen years of marriage to a man I love more than words can say, this book was for me. We have an incredible marriage; we acknowledge that everyone doesn’t have what we have. While things are good for us and we don’t have major issues to work through, a subtitle like “enjoying your marriage in the midst of the grind” caught my attention. The grind is exactly why this a game changer for me (and Hubby by default).
Hubby is my best friend in this world and there’s no one I’d rather do life with. Nonetheless, I love this reminder that there is no big secret to a fun, loving marriage. If we want to keep this wonderful thing going, we must honor, enjoy, and prioritize one another over all the distractions that surround us.
As a homeschool mom, my mind is often a whirlwind of lesson plans, supplies to be gathered, and library books due back. And even if we subtract the homeschool and just have the mom factor, I’m plenty busy there too. Keeping these angels in line isn’t always easy. If I’m not in mom mode, I’m likely in blogging mode. (And this little thing takes BIG work!) And if I’m not blogging or schooling, I’m doing laundry, preparing a meal, or getting ready for something at church. Yeah, my brain is often in overdrive.
Hubby is a minister. Focusing on others, connecting them to the One True God, and helping them live for Him is what he’s called to do. There’s not much time for self in all of that. Add the fact that he just graduated from Liberty University and you can see that we’ve not had much time for “us” lately. It’s one of those things that I understand because it’s part of the calling and working on a degree doesn’t last forever, but…
I’m seeing now that we’ve got to do better about making time for us. We spend a lot of time focusing on others – not a bad thing by any means – but we’ve got to prioritize our marriage. Dating is the perfect way to do that. The emphasis on dating (after being married thirteen years) makes so much sense. It’s a shame we didn’t think of it on our own.
Good gravy, dating is so much fun. I was taken back to the four years we dated before we married. We had so much fun becoming “us” in those years. There’s no reason we can’t have that now, too, and have it all the time! Fun Loving You reminded me that it’s important to date and date regularly. Better yet, it’s loaded with ideas for date nights, getaways, and simple, yet awesome ways to hang out together. We’re excited about putting these ideas in motion and making time for us! But what about the kids?
Prioritizing our marriage is important for us, but it also benefits our children greatly. I didn’t have that growing up, but I’d love to for our children to learn how amazing marriage can be just by watching us. I want them to know that their dad is my best friend. I want them to know that we love spending time together. I want them to know that their dad makes me swoon. (He does, that’s for sure.) Why on earth would I hide that from our kids?
More so, why wouldn’t I tell him all of that all the time? I was reminded of the importance of verbalizing and demonstrating these things while reading this book. I know that he knows I adore him, how I desire him, how I love to spend time with him, and how I appreciate all he does for our family. But isn’t it always a good idea to communicate those things?
So, yeah, this book was a great read for me! No kidding, I laughed uncontrollably, I ugly-cried a lot, and, ahem, even did my fair share of blushing. (Full disclosure: there are some aspects of the book that I didn’t mention here; rather delightful aspects, but the kind of thing that would be better for you to (re)discover with your spouse.) If you’re married, do yourself and your spouse a favor. Grab this book and read it. It’s everything a book on Christian marriage should be. And I’m a better wife because of it.